Aftercare
What is it and why do it?
Personally I believe just after an event, or a few days after will not procure the entire result. It will give some, but the real material comes about a week and a half later. So, I arrange for the bottom to contact me:
1. A day later
2. 3 days later
3. 10 days later
These times are somewhat flexible, but necessary in my opinion. Most importantly it is a part of the scene for me. I need that feedback and feel ripped off when the bottom either does not comply or does not take it seriously.
To that…I must say that it should not be of importance why I ask for something…it should be …my wish is your command…because it gives me pleasure so DO IT and don’t think you know or understand my motivation!!!
Because I am kind, and find bottoms are not dispensable…I will give you more information!
Many times people find out and/or find there way into our community because of fantasies they have had forever. Others just wind up with a kinky lover and then when that relationship ends need to find someone/anyone else who can bring them to that place. The place where time stops and pheromones flow.
As I have told many a bottom, anyone who is skilled and has the experience can give you these feelings. The trick is sniffing them out. You can do this by showing up. Just doing it in this case is NOT the answer. What is preferred is going to events and parties, making friends and talking to the others. See it as an interview. Find out what makes the bottom tick. How they do what they do, and what they got out of the scene they did.
At social events many times people are willing to share with you. Your job is to find out who has what you really want. And a major part of that, even if you don’t think so, is the aftercare.
Because at some point you will run into something you see or do that is hard on you. Is emotionally difficult. Something that will bring up feelings you don’t understand. That is when the experience of the Top plays a major role.
That is why I find out much in my negotiations. I get a feel for herstory and any medicinal uses, because they will affect the ability to endure pain.
AND by the way…I like you to FEEL the pain, not be a whipping post!
I believe Top and bottom both have a major responsibility to themselves and each other. This does not end the day of the scene. It ends when the after negotiation has been completed. When both …I said both feel done.
Personally I believe just after an event, or a few days after will not procure the entire result. It will give some, but the real material comes about a week and a half later. So, I arrange for the bottom to contact me:
1. A day later
2. 3 days later
3. 10 days later
These times are somewhat flexible, but necessary in my opinion. Most importantly it is a part of the scene for me. I need that feedback and feel ripped off when the bottom either does not comply or does not take it seriously.
To that…I must say that it should not be of importance why I ask for something…it should be …my wish is your command…because it gives me pleasure so DO IT and don’t think you know or understand my motivation!!!
Because I am kind, and find bottoms are not dispensable…I will give you more information!
Many times people find out and/or find there way into our community because of fantasies they have had forever. Others just wind up with a kinky lover and then when that relationship ends need to find someone/anyone else who can bring them to that place. The place where time stops and pheromones flow.
As I have told many a bottom, anyone who is skilled and has the experience can give you these feelings. The trick is sniffing them out. You can do this by showing up. Just doing it in this case is NOT the answer. What is preferred is going to events and parties, making friends and talking to the others. See it as an interview. Find out what makes the bottom tick. How they do what they do, and what they got out of the scene they did.
At social events many times people are willing to share with you. Your job is to find out who has what you really want. And a major part of that, even if you don’t think so, is the aftercare.
Because at some point you will run into something you see or do that is hard on you. Is emotionally difficult. Something that will bring up feelings you don’t understand. That is when the experience of the Top plays a major role.
That is why I find out much in my negotiations. I get a feel for herstory and any medicinal uses, because they will affect the ability to endure pain.
AND by the way…I like you to FEEL the pain, not be a whipping post!
I believe Top and bottom both have a major responsibility to themselves and each other. This does not end the day of the scene. It ends when the after negotiation has been completed. When both …I said both feel done.
posted by Night Hawk at 9:04 AM
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